Forgiving and praying for our enemies isn’t just some lofty, feel-good idea—it’s a real challenge. And let’s be honest, it often feels downright impossible. When someone wrongs us, the last thing we want to do is pray for their well-being. But here’s the kicker: holding onto bitterness only weighs us down.
We’re living in a world where conflicts—personal, political, even digital—flare up faster than ever. Whether it’s a backstabbing coworker, a toxic friend, or some faceless internet troll, enemies come in all shapes and sizes. But what if the secret to real peace isn’t getting even, but letting go?
How Can You Pray for Your Enemies?
If praying for an enemy feels like lifting a mountain, you’re not alone. I remember struggling with this myself when an old friend betrayed my trust. Every time I tried to pray for them, my mind just filled with anger instead. But here’s what helped me:
1. Start Small
Don’t force yourself to pray a full-blown, heartfelt blessing if you’re not there yet. A simple, “God, help me deal with this anger,” is a great place to start. Baby steps count.
2. Be Honest with God
You don’t have to sugarcoat your feelings. If you’re mad, say so. If you don’t want to pray for them, admit that too. The goal isn’t fake holiness—it’s real conversation with God.
3. Ask for a Change of Heart
Instead of asking God to “fix” your enemy, try asking Him to shift your perspective. It’s amazing what happens when we start seeing people as broken humans rather than villains.
4. Pray for Their Transformation
This doesn’t mean praying that they become just like you (tempting, I know). Instead, ask God to guide them, help them grow, and bring them closer to Him.
What Does God Say to Do for Your Enemies?
Jesus didn’t just suggest we pray for our enemies—He commanded it.
In Matthew 5:44, He says: “But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” Not just tolerate them. Not just ignore them. Love them.
That’s a tall order, but it makes sense. When we pray for our enemies, we’re choosing grace over grudges. We’re refusing to let hate dictate our hearts. And as wild as it sounds, that actually frees us more than it benefits them.
Can I Pray Against My Enemies?
Let’s be real—sometimes we want to pray against our enemies, not for them. There’s even biblical precedent for this, like when David asked God to deal with his enemies in the Psalms.
But here’s the thing: praying against someone usually keeps us stuck in our pain. Instead, we can pray about them—asking God to handle justice while we release the emotional burden. It’s okay to want fairness, but vengeance? That’s God’s job, not ours.
How Do We Bless Our Enemies?
Praying is just the beginning. If we really want to go all-in on this radical kindness thing, here are a few ways to take it further:
- Speak well of them. Even if it’s just refraining from gossip, choosing silence over slander is a form of blessing.
- Find a way to help. This doesn’t mean being a doormat, but small acts of kindness can soften even the hardest hearts.
- Let go of the grudge. It’s not about pretending the hurt didn’t happen, but choosing not to let it define us.
A Quick Reality Check
Blessing an enemy doesn’t mean staying in toxic situations. If someone is genuinely harmful, distance is wise. But even from afar, we can pray, forgive, and let go.
Final Thoughts
Praying for our enemies isn’t about making them feel better—it’s about freeing ourselves from the poison of resentment. It won’t happen overnight, and that’s okay. But every time we choose prayer over pettiness, we take one step closer to real peace.
Now, over to you. Have you ever struggled with this? What’s helped you move toward forgiveness? Drop a comment below—I’d love to hear your thoughts!